indierawks

Thu, 03 Jan 2008 06:59:07 GMT

I don't think life will ever agree to staying constant,
it's unexpected, everything.

Mon, 26 Nov 2007 09:30:32 GMT

I just want to understand my life again.

Fri, 23 Nov 2007 21:44:13 GMT

I'm seriously pissed at whoever fucking broke my computer last week because I can't get it fixed and no one will fess up.
Last night made me realize that I have found some pretty amazing people in Chicago,
and along with that made it okay to be happy here, which makes me uneasy.
Not only that but I'm so scared to go home,
I just want to kidnap like four people and bring them back here with me.
Home has become a negative thing which I hate,
but I'm only making it negative because of one thing, which is just stupid

and my hands smell like goddamn gingerbread, fuckkk that.

this is all probably just because my lack of sleep and long day at work, but I don't care
I feel like shit right now.

Tue, 06 Nov 2007 16:52:43 GMT

I'm just waiting for the day when this starts getting easier.

Mon, 29 Oct 2007 01:28:07 GMT

I feel like I've lost every good person in my life and I completely blame it on myself,
but I'm stopping it right now.

Sun, 12 Aug 2007 00:15:33 GMT

I wish things weren't so complicated all the time.
I don't think I'm going to be able to make it,
but I'm not going to have anything to come back to.

Sat, 04 Aug 2007 02:36:09 GMT

I wish I wasn't so wreckless with my thoughts.
I'm digging my own grave with one arm and furiously trying to fill it back up with the other.

I also have heartburn, an overly full tummy, and am in the market for a decent camera under $130... ha. well, atleast my ebay account will be getting some well needed action tonight!

Sun, 17 Jun 2007 05:43:42 GMT

I just want to make you smile, to make you happy.
I want to feel like I'm making a difference in your life.
I want to still matter to you.

Sat, 16 Jun 2007 22:46:06 GMT

emotional rollercoaster!

Tue, 12 Jun 2007 15:25:36 GMT

I wish I was good enough for you.
I wish I made you happy.

I want to be and do both so badly it hurts.

Fri, 08 Jun 2007 01:20:25 GMT

I was at work today with nothing to do, so I sat and talked to a ninety year old lady who seriously doesn't understand how much insight on life she gave me, it's wonderful.

These past two weeks have been long + drastically emotional.
I'm glad they're ending on high notes, atleast for now.
and I'm glad I'm learning so much, growing as a person, and becoming closer to the people that matter to me.

I'm not over it yet, but I'm looking at it in a new light.
and I've gone from hating the idea of growing up to being excited to partake in it.
Because, I don't really have control over either, and I don't want things like them to overtake me to the point that they have been recently.

I basically feel really good about where my life is heading right now, even if it's not really where I want it to be at the moment.

Tue, 05 Jun 2007 07:19:29 GMT

thank you.

Sat, 02 Jun 2007 20:55:48 GMT

People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; Never throw out anybody.

Sat, 02 Jun 2007 18:07:53 GMT

i don't know what to do with myself.

Tue, 29 May 2007 06:14:42 GMT

I want to have a little person that I can keep in my pocket. And I want to be able to pull my little person out when I need to figure something out. And I want my little person to tell me the best thing to do, or the right decision to make, or where my life should be headed when I just can't figure it out.

yuppp.

Sat, 19 May 2007 05:59:00 GMT

my summer so far has consisted of indiepoints, chacha divaness, special brownies, and nineties dance parties in the myspace parking lot.
I don't ever want to go back to Chicago.

Thu, 17 May 2007 06:00:53 GMT

i don't ever want to grow up!
nevereverever

Sat, 12 May 2007 05:48:30 GMT

i keep smelling smoke and i hate it hate it hate it.

Thu, 03 May 2007 05:23:41 GMT

nothing good ever stays around for long and that sucks.

Sat, 28 Apr 2007 10:28:40 GMT

this is just a reminder to myself about how much i love getting drunk, going out, then coming back to the floor to hear our RA completely wasted, then sitting with her + telling her every story possible while sobering up. then going to bed watching the sun rise in redorangepink prettyness over the lake.

Mon, 16 Apr 2007 00:06:22 GMT

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO THIS WORLD?!?!?!

Sun, 15 Apr 2007 00:59:51 GMT

I've been experiencing major word vomit lately.
I am sorry if you've been puked up on.

worrdd vommmitt!

Thu, 12 Apr 2007 15:39:14 GMT

I need someone that can give me a new perspective on life.

Thu, 12 Apr 2007 15:38:19 GMT

life is busy and stressful, my brain is moving at 200 thoughts per second and I'm skipping way too many classes.
i have managed to rub the top few layers of my index finger off due to blending pastel for hours, and it feels funky everytime it rubs against something.
i get to take real journalism classes next semester, which makes me very happy.
i broke my suitcase twice trying to get from indiana to chicago.
i'm starting to truly realize how much people mean to me, and it's killing me.

Sun, 01 Apr 2007 22:07:55 GMT

I don't have anything figured out and I barely believe that anyone else does either!